John Cena retains the WWE Championship in a 4-way match that I thought was just “OK”. The big spots – Roman Reigns spearing Orton through a barricade – we’ve seen before, about two dozen times. Roman had some good momentum, and it was nice to hear chants that weren’t ALL about John Cena. In general I don’t like 4-way matches, because they end up being spot-save, spot-save, spot-save until finally they head towards a series were everyone does their spot, and nobody is left to make the save. Cena getting the final pin felt flat, even though it was hands down the most predictable moment of the PPV.
I’m a Cena fan, and at this point I don’t even interact with the haters because it’s been a DECADE and I don’t care about ANYTHING enough to argue with people for TEN FREAKING YEARS. That being said, the upcoming match with Brock Lesnar – the one everyone knows is coming – is looking to be a no-win situation for me. I understand that it’s not John or Brock’s fault that Daniel Bryan got hurt and needed surgery, nor is it WWE’s fault for making the best of a bad situation. But right now I’m just not interested in the title picture, and I don’t want either guy to leave SummerSlam as the champion.
Look at the bigger picture for a second. If John Cena wins, he’s just beaten the guy that beat the Streak. Where does that momentum – which is already basically dead and laying in a ditch somewhere – go if Cena wins? NOWHERE. ZERO new wrestling fans are gained if John Cena beats Brock Lesnar. Ratings and buyrates stay the same as they have been for years. But if Brock Lesnar wins, we have a part-time champion. Remember the last time WWE had a part-time champion? It was the Rock, and it ruined one of the best title reigns in history.
Some are saying Lesnar wins the title to set up a match with Roman Reigns at WrestleMania. Brock Lesnar isn’t going to hold the WWE title for the next NINE MONTHS. We may get a total of THREE matches out of him this year, but there’s no way WWE gets that many dates out of him. And even if he does stick around for the major title defenses on PPV – even if the reign only lasts two months, or less – they have no champion to defend on the road for live events. History shows that’s not good for business, and with Daniel Bryan still out for the foreseeable future, that sounds like a recipe for disaster.
So Paul Heyman is on a plane today – or at least this is the Twitter story – to go pick up his “Option C” for Raw tomorrow night. Keep in mind, John Cena will NOT be on Raw tomorrow night, nor will he be on Raw next week. So if things are as predictable as they often are, we’re looking at two weeks of Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar talking about breaking The Streak, and challenging an absent champion. Does anyone think that sounds even remotely interesting? Even if John was there, we’ve BEEN THERE and DONE THAT. I was in Chicago to see their last match, and unless Cena turns a key and unlocks this magical, previously unknown personality he’s kept hidden for the past decade, it’s not going to be any different! Cena is always Cena. Heyman is godlike, but he’s always Heyman. Brock is the definition of one-dimensional, even if it works for him. NOTHING about this program could hope to be different than their last.
So hang in there with me for a second, while I throw down a hypothetical situation. What if “Plan C” was actually something interesting. What if “Plan C” could help the SummerSlam buyrate, the Raw ratings, the live attendance and sell merchandise all at the same time? Everyone and their mother is expecting Brock Lesnar on Raw tomorrow night, but what if “Plan C” is actually Plan C…M Punk?
CM Punk vs. John Cena at SummerSlam (yes, again) is interesting. Where has Punk been? When did he sign a new contract? How long will he be around? Why is he back with Paul Heyman after beating the hell out of him in 2013? Is Punk aligned with The Authority because he just “doesn’t give a shit” anymore? If he beats Cena, could we actually get the main event level Punk-Bryan feud we’ve always wanted?
I know there’s a lot of people rolling their eyes at me, because either you know Punk isn’t coming back, or you hate the guy because he took his ball and went home. But I really don’t care, and if you hate a guy who entertained you for years – who broke his body and his spirit to entertain you – because he left a few months early, than I don’t care about your opinion. Sorry – that’s just the way it is.
The CM Punk return story is a better story, and a better draw than anything John Cena and Brock Lesnar will put together in the next month. It’s bigger than Chris Jericho, bigger than Roman Reigns ascension, bigger than Seth Rollins Money in the Bank contract – hell, it’s BIGGER THAN STEPHANIE VS. BRIE BELLA!!
Sometimes predictable can be good. But predictable and boring is never good. Everything about the WWE product is predictable right now. Some of it, like the Wyatt Family or Dean Ambrose or the Battleground tag match, is really solid. But most of it’s boring, and not worth my $10 per month. More important, it’s not worth my time, which is worth a lot more than $10 per month. I don’t care about Brock/Cena II. I don’t care about Reigns/Orton. I would care even less if it was Kane/Orton.
Personally I don’t care about CM Punk either, because he’s retired and he can finally be a human being, which isn’t interesting to me. It shouldn’t be interesting to you. Leave the guy alone… But if that music hits tomorrow… If “Plan C” isn’t just another tired, cliched wrestling story that will be good for five minutes, and frustratingly drawn out for the next eight weeks…
WWE needs CM Punk. Tell me why I’m wrong below.
